I often find myself slipping into a state of depression when others do not want to really be with me. Numerous thoughts flow through my mind as I think to myself why anyone would not want to be with me. I feel that I am a very likeable person who can never cause harm to others.
Sometimes I feel the need to converse with people to allow their true feeling about me to emerge. I often look at facial expressions while talking to others. Once I find out that a person does not want to be with me, I will walk around my home feeling very depressed.
I am usually in my room playing music and will not talk on the phone. I would give friends and family excuses for not talking on the phone. My self-esteem is threatened by those who choose to distance themselves from me. I’ve often thought that my personality and my appearance were not adequate for relationships with others.

Every time that I meet someone new, I have a habit of holding my head down while we are talking. Several of my relationships were sabotaged for the fear of being abandoned. I have always felt that everyone is out to hurt me, so that’s why I will break off relationships first.
My relationship with others has always suffered when others have abandoned me. I feel that I cannot trust anyone. That everyone is out to use and abuse me. I have to repair my self-esteem every time I’m abandoned by someone. I’ve learned that this is a healing process. I will listen to music for hours until my head is clear of demeaning thoughts.

I often try to improve my appearance by losing weight or changing the way I dress. Thoughts flow through my mind that if I look better, that people would want to be with me. That no one would be able to resist the new me and would finally give me a chance.
A wall is often put up as a form of protection. I try not to make new friends nor attempt to be in relationships. I try to avoid others in public by looking down and not giving eye contact. I’ve distanced myself from others to prevent from dealing with abandonment issues. 

I rarely hang out with friends to avoid being disappointed. I am a person that cannot handle rejection or being left alone. I have always put my all into relationships and later find out that the person does not want to be with me.